confession

Confession
written by: Ti.anna
Broken hearts and the untold truth,

Is where the enemy breeds.

thoughtless words and spiteful thoughts,

Is where he mercilessly feeds.

You see my laughter and the sparkle in my eye,

you tel me its nothing but a lie,

A lie im living to wash away all wrong doing

you tell me its a mask to cover and deny.

And today i want to show you my face,

The face that you believe is hidden,

Ill reveal the scars that only words could have caused,

so tell me now do u see any difference?

My "mask" is nothing but a sheild,

my anger is naught but a con,

my words are but only a weapon,

to combat this battlle that im fighting alone.

Everyday is a fork in the road,

Every intention is honest from within

yet every choice takes me a little furthur

Into this landslide that pulls me in.

Im burried deep now inside these stones,

And every cursse against me is another boulder,

And forgiveness takes away all the pain,

And sayin "im sorry" takes the burden off my shoulder.

And today i see a light up furthur,

It makes me feel more welcome than ive ever felt before,

And the warmth of it all just makes me melt,

magically i feel pain no more.

And this light it gives me courage today,

to face all my troubles right in the eye.

This light it opens my mouth and helps me say

those words mean to come out but eventually die.

I never meant to do those things ,

but it always seemed so easy,

i never meant to cry but if i dont i feel so queasy,

Inever meant to pinch you wherre it hurt the most

All i ever meant was to hold ure hand and say "im there".

You know how they say "fight cold with cold". Well we need to do just that. No not fight cold with cold , we need to fight love with love, giving with giving, good gestures with some more , you get the point.I've heard that the only people you should get even with are the one that help you when you need it. It made me realise how mindlessly we try and get back at people who have hurt us or how things spit out of our mouths like fire from a dragon and scorch the person who could have been given a chance but now has scars from what you've said.
"but ive been hurt SOOOO bad" u think in self - defense. So what? The gratest wounds get healed if its taken care of properly.But poking your finger into it constantly will only cause it to fester more right?
So we need to clean out these wounds gently with a disinfectant and bandage them to protect yourself for any external germs. Similarly..we need to gently clean out our past hurt with care,kindess,forgiveness nd genrosity and bandage up our broken hearts so that we do not allow any outside source to influence us against the people we love.
Here's the flipside, almost everyone we meet now responds to a kind gesture differently
there's the diabetic sweet person who is overwhlemed by the gesture and goes out and out to repay it.
theres the suspicious one thinking"why would he/she do this for me..hmmmm"
there's the silent observer who s touchd by the gesture and keeps the warm feelings to himself.
there's the ultimate pessimist thinking" omg that brat! thinks he can fool me with a sweet gesture so ibreak down for good"
there's the mentor who advices you and encourages you on continuing such acts .
So how do you go about this giving process when you're not sure how peopel will react?
If you're one of the many who think this, know that you're giving not because you want them to react in a certain way but because you acknowledge the importance of that person in your life and have a desire to give whatever you can offer to bring a smile on their face. FULLSTOP. That is all you need to think.
It may get frustrating when you want to be of help and your not needed.Keep giving in a subtle way, Help the person in a way that he/she wo'nt know.This is will be easy if you really really want to help someone.
And concluding this post, let me just share with you my views on unconditional giving
firstly it is VERY VERY difficult, it takes time and effort - 2 things that people have become stingy about, it has to be purely sub conscious to be genuine and if ure one such person, the world is very lucky to have you:)
No matter how much people tell you that you're silly to keep giving, know that if you give in to them you'll lose your place as one of the few people in the world who are capable of such a Godly act:)