I fail to understand the constant need to find flaws in a person while claiming to love them unconditionally.Why cant our days be filled with striving to consciously be kinder, humor mistakes, forgive instead of judging, labeling and forming lifelong opinions.
How is it that you can be a constant blessing to hundreds of strangers yet shun your own people with thoughtless tags and hurtful words?
Since my early days, I was taught by practice and by observation to be kind, sensitive and caring  and generous regardless of whom I was sharing these acts with. I felt blessed to belong to a family that didn't just instill these virtues in me but also practiced it.
When you grow up, it gets harder to cultivate these qualities. When my relationship with God consciously began, I started realising how Christlike these qualities were and felt honored to have them as a part of my personality and not something I would have to learn to be.
The more kinds of people we meet , it would seem that being patient and kind would get harder but sometimes when you've perceived it the way God would want you to you realise that on the contrary it gets more natural to deal with things with empathy.
Makes me appreciate for the zillionth time just how much we need God to be our guide . No amount of anger,tears or time will ever heal like just one wisdom imparting touch by the author of love and forgiveness Himself.
Its no wonder that tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Because every thing that has gone down has made me immensely thankful . It would take me forever to list but for now I'm thankful that today gave me a reason to write!;)

This post one contained everything you should know about me. My quirks, my flaws, my inadequacies and all the good stuff too. And then it got erased. You havent shown up yet you know, so  why would you need to know all of that? I'm not even the same anymore.
I have new quirks and flaws that I never knew would present themselves and u know what? Ull have to find out for yourself i guess. And Im gonna love knowing that you 'll want to.
For once in my entire life Im not sure of what I want you to be, How I want you to look and In what way ull love me. I dont know if you'll be an angry boy like I dreamt bout or an intellectual conversationalist, a clown or a biker boy. I dream of you sometimes and then I wonder if thats how you 'll be when we finally meet , but I wont know, will I?
Sometimes I dont think I can wait that long but I'm counting on the fact that you will change that.

Water on a wax doll that's what its become
Stoic.
Saline streams inside a face that's smiling.
Creates an ocean raging inside a heavy soul

People always leave
Doors always shut
Places always remain far
And you wake up  from all dreams.

Its that feeling when inertia defies all science
Its a constant shock, a constant jerk, a numb surprise
A stab with a blunt knife
A throb

Staggering along a mind recess
Darkest its been in a while

Your light refuses to dim
Your love, it defies all science too
Change is not always inevitable
Because You are constant

I wonder if nostalgia is never a bittersweet feeling for anyone? I hate that right now its more bitter than sweet though. Im wishing for the 6th time in the past hour that I was 15 again, listening to Dilemma and being in love and knowing what forever meant, dreaming of endless possibilities in dream induced lands that i was sure existed and would be revealed in my destiny. 10 years since then and if i count the many dreams that have been stolen from me, the ones that have died,the ones that u've had the opportunity to live and never repeat,the ones that have been dismissed, i may as well be left with nothing. Is that how old people become old?
I dont want that. I dont want to age into a person that knows it all, I want to wonder forever, I want endless possibilities always and dreams that im not ashamed to let go off.
Does it get better? Am I perceiving it all wrong? Is this solitude a stepping stone? I dont know. Does anyone feel the same amount of frustration? The feeling of wanting something so bad and not wanting it equally bad. Its not even an unfamiliar feeling, just one that overwhelms me. My patience gets thin and I retreat into hermitage to avoid hurting people that matter.
There's too much pain and anger surrounding the air. No amount of hugs given will heal his pain. No amount of months spent did anything that would make him miss me when it stopped. I've never been a quitter but i have been an submissive friend. I'm holding on to prayer, but letting go of all else. Im not sure if thats what im supposed to be doing but im doing it.I/m so tired of dragging myself up again, when each time I get heavier . I'm so tired.... Im just really tired.
SO tired. :(

Even If i could stop these echoes of your voice in my head, I wouldn't! Your altered twang when you said "sorry" , your laugh, your soft hair, the way you would hit me and run away when I ruffled your hair, The cuddles you let me give you, tutoring you, none of it will ever leave me Micah. I wont let it.
Every unspoken moment and every moment that I will wish you were still around will remind me of it all.
Your gentle but perturbed soul, the anger that you held in so tight, the look in your eyes that always made me want to tell you how much you mean to me, and now I will.
I love you. You were nothing short of family. Ever since you were born with your epic baby mohawk and your big round eyes, I knew I would love you. And I do. Your hair remained epic and your eyes unchanged but look how destiny changed everything else. You grew up so beautifully quiet, giggling, smiling shyly and so incredibly lovable. Every time  you came home from school, you brought a little warmth inside my heart and no matter how little time we actually spent together the fact that I remember every bit of it reverberates the intensity of that I felt for you Michs.
All   I want now for you is that your spirit be comforted by God in an eternal embrace. 20 years doesn't suffice in love, no amount of time ever does. Its how love works. It does not fail, it does not perish.

Im glad we had "our moments" Michu, the ones that were exclusive to you and me. Im glad that two awkwardly shy people like us opened up to those moments,little did we know they would end. I love how our stupid pokemon nicknames never got too kiddish to continue.

Every word will fall short of how Im feeling just having to accept this horrid fact but every pang in my heart will constantly remind me of how much you mean to me

Love you baby brother <3 p="">Squirtle....:)